chances of bad news at 20 week scan mumsnet

And as, and as soon as I saw the pictures of the scan, having had two normal pregnancies, even I could see that there was a marked contrast between this pregnancy and the pictures that I'd had previously. Our week-by-week PREGNANCY emails are a must for parents-to-be. But it's bloody hard being miserable the whole time. Finally, Monday came and we went back to the hospital. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . And I, my husband and I both ran our own business at the time so we were desperate to get back and do some work, and things were going really well, so.. In most cases the scan will show that your baby appears to be developing as expected but sometimes a condition is found or suspected. I returned to be told they wanted to scan me again, another internal to see exactly what was happening. Our nightmare began when I went for my 20-week scan. I've realised that being a nice person is a luxury some can't afford. When I see a child with Down's syndrome, I have a tremendous need to explain myself and apologise a million times over. The next day, it was confirmed that my bloods had again dropped. This might be uncomfortable. Some of the other conditions, such as heart defects, are more difficult to see. And again, you know, you read all the books and it tells you 'this is the diagnostics', but after a while you don't hear that inside your head any more No, no, no, I'm fine - because everything's perfect. The results come in stages. Baby loss support She just said, 'It's a bit short, it needs to be checked' again basically. It's quite common, perhaps 1 in 10 they find these, and within a few weeks they disappear. For once in my life, I had been organised. Specialist scans So she said, 'Come back on Monday. My partner went out with him, wanting to see him. He wanted to talk about it, but I didn't. Registered office: Nicholas House, 3 Laurence Pountney Hill, London, EC4R 0BB. I think I was about 20 weeks cos they, the hospital I think did the 12 and the 20, that was their standard thing and, yeah, so I got the 20 weeks one. BabyCenter. She didn't want to see the baby. Sam followed and I broke down. My belly was growing and I was feeling great. That was an extremely difficult day. Try to relax and take it easy. For example, some babies have a condition called open spina bifida, which affects the spinal cord. My wife had been very, very healthy, more healthy than the first pregnancy, and of course was shattered by the fact that the news, the news was appalling, very serious faces. You may need to have a full bladder when you come for the appointment. Seated in the antenatal clinic with lots of expectant mothers with baby bumps. And I wish that I'd been told at that point, that somebody had actually turned round to me and said, 'Look, I'm sorry, but I think there's something very wrong. But the closeness has remained after the drama has died down. I thought I was going to burst into tears. So I was a bit ignorant of the kind of things, you know, what the scans were really doing - maybe it was, a bit na've I think. I just feel very unlucky. Specialist scans had a powerful effect on some parents because they could see the baby more clearly and in some cases people recognised which parts of the baby's body were not working properly. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here), tbh, they never give you good news at scans. Never lacking a sense of the dramatic, it felt as if we shared the responsibility for the terrible, dirty act that we had committed. And also what the prognosis would mean for our two year old: now a very happy child, he would have a completely different childhood with such an ill sibling. As I waited for the doctor back on the EPU unit. So instead, I was advised to go home and let nature take its course. . There was cause for concern. I was disgusted - disgusted that such a tablet existed, let alone that I should have to take it. Originally I hadn't wanted to go down that road. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. So I trusted him. Three midwives came and went. . You may like someone to come with you to the scan appointment. And at that point I don't think we, I don't think we realised that there might have to be a decision, because we'd talked about it with, with Down's and the other possible problems, but at this point it was, well okay what can be done to fix the problem - because yes the heart's not developing properly but there must be something we can do. And everybody knows and everything is right. Some parents wondered if it was possible to have the same scan done at 16 weeks rather than 20 weeks. And I went for, I went for a normal 12-week scan, at my local hospital and everything, they said everything was fine, there was no problem. The doctor gave her consent, and I took the four little tablets. No one else attended and we didn't have a service. This was on the Friday. So obviously quite relaxed. And you know, we were laughing and joking. 80 percent of my pregnancies have ended in death and I felt like they were telling me those babies didn't matter. And so began the most bizarre day of my life. And even at that early stage it was beginning to sink in that there was something really not right. The hardest thing I have ever done | Health | The Guardian We had the baby cremated. Good luck has not come easily over the past few years. The Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists (RCOG) have produced a report on Termination of Pregnancy for Fetal Abnormality in England, Scotland and Wales (May 2010). Just doing it. The scan looks for 11 different conditions in your baby and cannot find everything that might be wrong. I think I don't everything just seems a real blur because it was, it was such a strange experience. I know I could have delivered him in a quarter of the time, but I couldn't bear the thought of him leaving me. Bad news at 20 week scan, please help. | Mumsnet Nights were impossible. It would be a personal tragedy for my partner and me, but that is all. Most scans show that babies seem to be developing as expected, and none of the 11 conditions are found. Then, three days later, I would go to the labour ward - the ward I had been expecting to visit in two and a half months. He then told us what the prognosis would mean for the child. Slightly marked from our peers. Not surprisingly, people aren't quite sure how to deal with me. No, you couldn't see there was anything wrong. Thinking back, I don't know how we left without him. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. And it all seemed so near at hand, you know, 31, 30 weeks, you feel like you're nearly, you're on the home stretch. And the local hospital wanted to send us off to the regional hospital to actually confirm that, and were not really prepared to say at that time that there was something very seriously wrong. Trying to carry on as normal, working and putting on a brave face. We just couldn't use the words. We'd just spent some time away on a, on a summer holiday and come back expecting to have this scan and be told, 'All fine. Some say this estimate is really below the reality, and the out-of-pocket average costs are higher. But the consultant had found more spots on the heart and the measurements were the same. Many parents were shocked by findings from the 20-week and later scans. After preparing myself to face having to take the medication. chances of bad news at 20 week scan mumsnet. 2022. So and you could see the exomphalus, this little pouch, which was obviously just the intestines where they are. And I'd been on the internet looking up all sorts of things and everything was so negative, it was very depressing, because I thought, 'Well, maybe they've made a mistake, or maybe it's something they can fix, I don't know'. And then all of a sudden, I was still laughing and we were all very upbeat, and then suddenly, he suddenly said, but I was still, still laughing, and he said to me, 'Oh, there might be a problem, there might be a problem with the, I think this baby has hydrocephalus'. The pain was bearable but uncomfortable, the hospital rang me a few days later and asked me how I was. And of course some other measurements she needed to take like the width of the skull, which she couldn't take because the fetus was in the wrong position. The same anxious wait for a little, pathetic cry. There was complete silence during the scan. I was willing the results to be normal. Let a mum know you're thinking of them send one of our personalised Mother's Day cards today, Home Health professionals use the 18-20 week scan to examine the baby's size and position, and also to check if his/her brain, heart, lungs and other internal organs are developing as expected. Bad news at 20 week scan | Mumsnet Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. I had my little leaflet, printed off leaflet about choroid plexus cysts. He told me that they may want to do blood tests, but that 'he didn't see the point'. That they could have spotted something, or not? And at that, I let out a scream I think. I had no idea if we were doing the "right" thing. It felt like a lifetime to reach our 12-week-scan. It is impossible to escape them and each one underlines your loss. I was experiencing some light bleeding for the past few days. The appointment usually takes around 30 minutes. It was interesting - well it was fantastic to see this fetus and to see this child that was yours that was horribly ill - but you didn't really get much opportunity to see that because the consultant was more about measurements and all sorts of blood flow and various other screens coming up. Can you describe the difference between the scan at this later stage in a pregnancy? Another sick joke. The doctor told me he was 98% sure this was a failing twin pregnancy. The scan was inconclusive, but the size of my little bump was measuring a lot smaller than it should have for 10 weeks. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. I am a darker, harder version of myself. And thank God I did. I couldn't have the added responsibility for changing his mind. My partner spent the weekend trying to convince me that things were OK. So had to come back in a week's time for a scan, which again is quite a common thing I found out. Though the 18-20 week scan can detect when certain parts of the baby's body have grown abnormally, it may not be possible for clinicians to identify why it has happened or make a firm diagnosis based on the scan alone. Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. The clinic advised a follow up scan the week after, to check on progress and to see what to do next. Why me and not you, you bastard? I think there might be a problem'. Within two days I was waiting in my local EPU unit for further tests. So we decided that, to have the scan and we went along I think early in the week for that, and spent quite a lot of time with the consultant after that. Some hospitals do offer earlier anomaly scans of the baby, but they will not show as much detail as scans performed between 18 and 20weeks. This publication is available at https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/screening-tests-for-you-and-your-baby/11-physical-conditions-20-week-scan. Hugely upset that to think that the baby was so poorly. She advised I be referred to the EPU to be assessed. Tissue paper will be tucked around your clothing to protect it from the ultrasound gel, which will then be put on your tummy. Could she possibly have something that's not been detected? In the case of a suspected abnormality, women should be seen for a second opinion by an expert in fetal ultrasound, such as a fetal medicine specialist. 13/12/2020 20:45. And, sometimes, I wish I had invited my whole family into the hospital room to see him. And shortly after that, that scan we'd finished and the consultant leant back and said, 'I'm afraid we have some problems here'. I don't know how we got through the next couple of days. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? The first result, which tells you if the baby has Down's syndrome, is ready in three days, but the other chromosomal problems cannot be eliminated for up to three weeks. For example, you may be offered further tests that have a risk of miscarriage. SO much upset and needless angst has been caused by 'soft markers' found at scans. I had no issues at my 20wk scan with DD - and neither did any of my antenatal group (9 mums). Apologise for somehow doubting their right to be in this world. So we left it there, and we didn't actually think that there was anything really to worry about after that scan. And so this one can't tell you anything, it's pictures, you're going, you're going to see your baby, you're going to get pictures. Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. Everywhere you look, there are happy, fat, smug pregnant women. The nursery I had selected for our two-year-old son; my maternity leave; the bunk beds; the summer holiday suitable for a newborn baby. The contractions started very quickly and within an hour my waters had broken. And I, and, I felt the weight of deciding what to do about it. Tears started to roll down my face. Some people want to find out if their baby has one of the 11 conditions and some do not. I want to be nice again. We needed closure, to allow us to grieve properly. This one cannot show you anything, that's what's inside your mind. We were denying him his life. He suggested he perform an amniocentesis immediately, to rule out any chromosomal problems. I faced another internal scan where I began to feel helpless and alone. She asked me how far gone I thought we were, and if I could have been mistaken. Most hospitals do not allow children to attend scans as childcare is not usually available.

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